Jesus Inside

At TREK training, we were blessed to have Kevin Boese lead us in worship once a week. He has just released a full studio album, available on iTunes and kevinboese.ionworship.org, which you should really check out. Anyway, when thinking about the last few weeks, one of the songs Kevin wrote, that we sang at training kept coming to mind: Jesus Inside. The lyrics are as follows:

Highly favored, blessed among women;
God's chosen servant, with Jesus inside.
A common woman, fearful and troubled,
yet trusting, expectant, with Jesus inside.

Glorious, glorious; precious one of God.

Highly favored, blessed among many;
God's chosen servants, with Jesus inside.
Common people, fearful and troubled,
yet trusting, expectant, with Jesus inside.

Glorious, glorious, made in the image of God.
Glorious, glorious, precious one of God.

Glory to glory, Jesus inside.
Glory to glory, Jesus on high.
Glory to glory, Jesus inside.
Glory to glory, Jesus on high.

Gloria, gloria, glory to God on high.
Gloria, gloria, glory to God on high.

Glorious, glorious, made in the image of God.
Glorious, glorious. Perfect one of God.

The event that really led to me thinking about this song surrounds Alison getting lice. After she found out, our neighbor and Alison's language helper, Dtuk, came over and starting helping to de-lice Alison. In the midst of the whole de-licing process of the next two days, Dtuk must have noticed "Jesus inside" of us, because she started asking some questions. She wanted to know why we (not just Alison and I, but our whole team) were so different from other people our age. Luckily, P'Bia (our Thai co-worker and friend) was there to explain to her that what she was seeing was Jesus inside of us; that's what made us different.
Since that day, Dtuk and her two children (Mai and Ban) have come to church every Saturday. Dtuk's husband, Mong, still hasn't come, but he lingers around outside. It has gotten to the point that Dtuk and her son Ban are over here all the time, which we love. It's great that they feel so comfortable here. For example: the other day, I walked down the stairs and found Ban asleep in our meeting room on the couch; and as I write this blog, Dtuk is sitting right next to me, studying English (and falling asleep). This family is big on all of our hearts, and could use a lot of prayer. They are so fun and so kind to us, we love them dearly, and I know that God's love for them is far beyond our own!

Hard Silence

I wrote this poem a few years ago, but it seems rather timely for me right now. I've been struggling a lot with doing my God time the last couple weeks. I think it started as one of those, "oh, I'll do it later" things, but has evolved into something within my heart resisting even when I start to pray. Prayer walking during church tonight was good, and definitely broke away some of that resistance, but I'm still several steps from where I should be. I need to spend some time in the hard silence.


Hard Silence

In the hard silence
Come those moments
The ones you live for
The ones you'd die for
The moments that change you
The moments that renew you
The moments that cleanse you
They come in the hard silence

So take a step back
Let the moment in
Search hard for the silence
That makes you new again
'Cause after you go looking
And calm yourself a while
You'll find that He's there
Waiting in the hard silence

A Meal, A Milestone, A Memory

Yesterday was a day to be remembered. Though Sunday is normally our day off, we were blessed to be a part of the first baptism for the Phuket Life Centre church. We traveled out to a beach on the north end of the island that is part of a national park with many of our regular church attendees and a few other friends to baptize Guy. Those of us that arrived first were able to squeeze in a quick swim in the water before the festivities began. As we gathered together, Greg explained baptism and the reasons a believer chooses to be baptized. Guy professed his desire and motivations to be baptized.

We sang a song of praise, and headed out to the water. As Greg and Chai walked out a way into the water with Guy, other people followed, getting knee or waist deep themselves. I couldn't hear the conversation between Greg, Chai, and Guy, but I could see the brotherhood between them. In a land and time where men of God are rare, here were three men of differing backgrounds, ages, and stories, demonstrating true discipleship and Christly brotherhood. As Guy went into the water and arose again, cheers arose in our group, hugs were had, and smiles spread across faces.

We gathered together to pray over Guy, to pray blessing and protection over him as he continued moving forward in His journey with the Lord.
Then we began to sit down for a meal. I tell no lie when I say that it was very likely the best meal I've had in my time thus far in Thailand. I don't simply mean that the food was great, which it was (som-tum, fried chicken, sticky rice, a variety of fruits and vegetables, and multiple glorious desserts); but in a moment, the beauty of it all overwhelmed me. The joy of the work of the LORD being accomplished, the story of one individual's life and God's calling, the recalling of God's call to and anointing upon each of us, the fellowship of believers (and believers-to-be, but all friends), all amidst the beauty of God's creation. I was certain that within that meal, I had tasted a piece of heaven (and it wasn't just the baked goods).
After the meal, we continued to fellowship together. Some went to the water, some to watch planes land at the airport, some teaching or practicing Thai, and others worshiping God in song. Though the day was long, it was beautiful in every way. I pray that God would bless you and us here with such days, in numbers beyond counting.

None But Jesus

Well, one week from now, I'll be in Thailand for the assignment phase of TREK. Training has been incredible, and I apologize for not keeping this better updated. I plan to provide a few updates this week to summarize some of my experiences at training, as well as providing you all with some information about my wonderful team and the ministry we'll be a part of in Thailand.
For now, I want to talk about the song "None But Jesus" by Hillsong United (lyrics below). This song has meant a lot to me for a while, but has become more real to me in the last couple months. During the 48 hour silent retreat, I had the opportunity to soak in an extended period of stillness before God, where I found restoration, peace, and renewal in His presence. I have continued to experience all of these things while in God's presence since then as well. In the areas of my life that I am most weak, God has shown mercy and grace to me. Whether in matters of sin and temptation, or aspects of my life and faith that need growth, God's mercy and grace have become abundantly more clear to me.
I have known more than ever in the past two years the faithfulness of God. The more faithful, loving, gracious, merciful, healing, kind, and good the LORD reveals himself to be, the more I am certain that I want to do nothing more in my life is to bring Him praise!


NONE BUT JESUS
In the quiet, in the stillness, I know that you are God.
In the secret of your presence, I know there I am restored.
When you call I won't refuse. Each new day again I'll choose:

There is no one else for me, none but Jesus.
Crucified to set me free, now I live to bring Him praise.

In the chaos, in confusion I know you're sovereign still.
In the moment of my weakness you give me grace to do your will.
So when you call, I won't delay. This my song through all my days:

There is no one else for me, none but Jesus.
Crucified to set me free, now I live to bring Him praise.
There is no one else for me, none but Jesus.
Crucified to set me free, now I live to bring Him praise.

I am yours and you are mine. I am yours and you are mine.
I am yours and you are mine. I am yours Lord.

All my delight is in you Lord.
All of my hope, all of my strength.
All my delight is in you Lord, forevermore.
All my delight is in you Lord.
All of my hope, all of my strength.
All my delight is in you Lord, forevermore.

There is no one else for me, none but Jesus.
Crucified to set me free, now I live to bring Him praise.

Brief Prayer Request

Well, it has certainly been an eventful week and a half. I have been given so much information to absorb! I will right more later, but for now I just wanted to send out a couple prayer requests. First, I have been having a couple health issues (nothing major), but it is distracting and slowing me down. Rest and healing would be wonderful, but be sure to pray as the Spirit leads. Also, tomorrow afternoon we begin our 48 hour silent retreat. Please pray that my ears are open to hearing God's voice, that my hands are empty of anything I may have been holding onto that would hinder my relationship and communication with God, and that my heart is humble in the presence of the Almighty, my rock and provider. Thank you!

The Chase

The door
The chase
The dream that I now face
Neither here
Nor there
But almost anywhere
It rains
It falls
The Kingdom always calls
A seed
A plant
A wild growing chant
A stretch
A reach
Grace enough for each

Redemption calls
Mercy falls
Awakened I run free
Tomorrow comes
I am not done
And back again I go

The dark
A pit
The emptiness screams quit
A cry
A voice
Another choice
Believe
Let go
Let Him save your soul
Begin
Again
Give Him control in
Your words
Your heart
To set your soul apart
To walk
To run
And bask beneath the sun
Run true
Run fast
Know that it will last
The door
The chase
The dream that I now face


I wrote this poem reflecting my feelings about doing TREK. TREK itself has been a dream for me for several years; I see it partly as a stepping stone to my vocation of ministry and missions. At times I feel inadequate, worried, like I should quit now before I go. But every time I go there, God pulls me right back out. He is so good to me, even when I am at my worst, or when life has knocked me down. I pray that in all I do, I will bring His Name honor and glory.

TREK

I'm going on TREK! TREK is a 10 month mission and discipleship program with Mennonite Brethren Mission and Service International. They describe it as follows...

* TREK is our most intense short term mission opportunity, designed to help you learn, grow and serve. Our vision is for "Disciples who make disciples." You will partner with our international missionary teams as they engage in holistic church planting that transforms communities among the least reached. This opportunity is for mature Christians who want to go further in their relationship with God, and broader in their understanding of the global church. If you desire to be real with God, inspired in the company of hard-core believers, serve in overseas missions, and be stretched in exciting and lasting ways, TREK may be the direction for you.

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* TREK is all about risk-taking obedience to Jesus, relinquishing our own rights, and learning to delight in him. We believe that mission is quite simply the outpouring of the great things God is doing in our own lives.
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* We should warn you that it can be a painful process being refined by God. He pinpoints areas of our lives that we are still holding on to, and waits patiently for us to let go, but as we surrender, he faithfully does more excellent things through us than we ever could have planned for ourselves!

On September 12th, my journey begins! Please join me on this journey by reading my blog and holding me in your prayers!